Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled

Trauma informed coaches Lavinia Brown and Andrew Lynn join Janet to discuss how they help parents identify triggers and heal wounds that are preventing them from being the parents they wish to be and otherwise negatively impact their daily lives. Andrew says: "Trauma robs you of the freedom to choose how you react." In this encore episode, Lavinia and Andrew describe some of the common signs of trauma and repressed emotions, how they recognized their own, and how their respective coaching practices enable parents to process these emotions by connecting with the needs of their inner child. Reach Lavinia at ⁠LaviniaBrown.com⁠. Her Instagram is LaviniaBrownCoaching. Reach Andrew at ⁠AndrewLynn.net⁠, or on Instagram at Andrew.g.Lynn. Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at ⁠NoBadKidsCourse.com⁠ and ⁠JanetLansbury.com⁠. Please support our sponsors! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Inspired by a couple's Instagram video of their determined toddler, Janet shares a 4-step sequence of responses to encourage our kids to persevere, even through frustration.  Deddeh Howard's video: https://www.instagram.com/p/DKfLwy0p2q-/?hl=en Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠NoBadKidsCourse.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠JanetLansbury.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Please support our sponsors! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet responds to questions from two parents who describe their sensitive children struggling with separation, transitions, and general emotional overwhelm. One writes, “I go into panic mode when I see his eyes widen with worry,” while another admits, “I often see the meltdown coming… and don’t know how to help without making it worse.” Both parents admit they have their own strong emotional reactions to their kids' struggles including fear, guilt, and self-doubt. Janet points out how our own discomfort can exacerbate our children's, and how caring for ourselves is both compassionate and foundational to effective parenting. She offers solutions how these parents might more readily trust their children to feel and process their discomfort.  Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠NoBadKidsCourse.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠JanetLansbury.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Please support our sponsors! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Toddler twins are suddenly melting down at bedtime. A 5-year-old is struggling to manage his unruly friend. Janet explains how parents in both these cases can help to resolve these issues by better understanding their children's sensitivity to change.  Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠NoBadKidsCourse.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠JanetLansbury.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Please support our sponsors! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Janet responds to emails from parents who describe struggling with their children’s strong emotions. One writes that her 2-year-old rejects her comfort when he has a meltdown. “It breaks my heart, and I feel like I must be doing something wrong.” Another writes that her 7-year-old says he doesn’t feel love from his mother. Another email describes how a 3-year-old’s tantrums last all afternoon and into the evening, disrupting the rest of the family’s routine, and they “all feel trapped by a 3-year-old.” And a therapist observes that her child holds in emotions in front of family and peers. In this encore episode, Janet identifies the common thread in all these situations and offers a hopeful answer to weather the storms. Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at ⁠⁠NoBadKidsCourse.com⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠JanetLansbury.com⁠⁠. Please support our sponsors! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A parent describes her 5.5-year old as the love of her life. Lately, though, her daughter has been dissolving into silly, immature behavior at inappropriate moments, melting down over nonsensical things, and demanding her mother's attention.  "It goes on and on, and I get tired and annoyed." On the other hand, this parent says she feels guilty for not playing along with her daughter's spontaneous games (like joining her in a crab-walking race down the stairs). She worries that at 5.5 years old, her daughter should be moving beyond this type of behavior. "Will she ever stop testing me, or is she just going to keep on seeing how much I can withstand?" Janet has some ideas. Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠NoBadKidsCourse.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠JanetLansbury.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Her best-selling books ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠“No Bad Kids: Toddler Discipline without Shame”⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠"Elevating Child Care: A Guide to Respectful Parenting"⁠⁠⁠⁠ are available wherever books are sold. Please Support Our Sponsors. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode: Janet receives a follow-up message from the mom she helped last week in the episode "Demanding, Stressed, and Aggressive—What's Happened to My Gentle Child?" The parent candidly shares aspects of Janet's advice that did and didn't work. She then reveals a transformative discovery: "We were getting boundaries and discipline all wrong. We were not being confident leaders or using honest consequences." This mom shares how the situation finally clicked for her and she was able to achieve positive results just three days later. "... The change is already incredible. I can see our four-year-old's real smile, silly loving nature, happiness for the day in the morning, and so much less aggression." Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠NoBadKidsCourse.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠JanetLansbury.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Her best-selling books ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠“No Bad Kids: Toddler Discipline without Shame”⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠⁠"Elevating Child Care: A Guide to Respectful Parenting"⁠⁠⁠ are available wherever books are sold. Please Support Our Sponsors. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices