Overview of How Long Gone #981
Chris Black and Jason Stewart spend this episode riffing on Sunday-morning suburban life, fashion, celebrity gossip, music, and a chaotic Hamptons weekend. The conversation moves quickly from neighbor-watch hoarder drama to leopard print, Perez Hilton, Drake’s viral bark clip, bird feeders with cameras, regional pop-country hits, and a few TV/movie recommendations. As usual, it’s equal parts status report, culture chat, and absurdist banter.
Main Topics Discussed
Sunday in New York / Neighbor Drama
- Jason opens with a muggy Sunday in NYC and his ongoing surveillance of the neighbors’ massive dump/cleanout.
- The situation escalated to two dumpsters and a truck, which they treat as definitive proof of serious hoarding.
- The tone is playful but also a little reflective about aging, decline, and what happens to people over time.
Fashion Talk: Pyrex, Leopard Print, and Throwback Swag
- A long stretch is dedicated to clothing rotation and “house fit” energy:
- Pyrex shorts, Erica Mena / burnt orange shorts, and the idea of looking right for neighborhood teens.
- A debate about whether leopard print is a neutral.
- Jason and Chris conclude that leopard can work in certain contexts, especially as shoes, but it still reads as risky for straight guys.
- They also reminisce about old-school fashion brands like Clandestine Industries and the Pete Wentz era.
- Chris mentions having once worn blue, green, purple, and orange hair colors, including a bleached-eyebrow look for a hair show.
Perez Hilton and the Old Internet Gossip Era
- They discuss Perez Hilton’s recent appearance online and his broader legacy.
- The main takeaway: the early internet celebrity-gossip era was way more vicious and direct than today’s media environment.
- They reflect on how celebrities used to fear gossip bloggers, often having to befriend them just to avoid getting dragged publicly.
Drake, the Bark Clip, and “Goth Baddies”
- Jason brings up Drake appearing on a dating show and barking like a dog at a woman’s request.
- They find it funny and classic Drake—performer mode, willing to play along.
- That leads to a longer bit about Drake dating a goth baddie, with the consensus that he probably has done so before and would be limited mostly by what music or subculture he can comfortably pronounce.
Hamptons Weekend Recap
- Chris recaps a packed Hamptons weekend:
- A clambake for Urban Jürgensen at the founder’s house.
- A stop at Jeff and Sarah’s house, where the kitchen looked like a working farm.
- A Derek Blasberg book signing at BookHampton.
- He also mentions riding the Blade seaplane, which becomes a great status-comedy set piece:
- Loud finance guys, suit types, festival people, and Diplo all on the same flight.
- Diplo’s assistant/“chief of staff” is described as wearing a “mullet daddy” shirt.
- Chris later notices the CEO of Live Nation on the return flight wearing two different festival merch items at once.
Bird Feeders, Birding, and Surveillance Tech
- A surprisingly long stretch is spent on bird feeders with cameras and AI identification.
- Jason is intrigued by the idea, while Chris warns that it could become a slippery slope into weird pet-owner behavior.
- They compare:
- a normal bird feeder with a camera
- versus a bird-feeder helmet that lets birds land on your head
- They ultimately agree that the camera feeder is acceptable in theory, but the fully immersive version is “much crazier.”
- This leads to a broader joke about how pet ownership can get weird when it crosses into too much identification and monitoring.
Music and Festival Talk
- They discuss:
- Charlie XCX joining The Strokes onstage
- how The Strokes now feel like a festival band
- the strange hierarchy of festival lineups
- They also get into a theory about breakout regional songs:
- Ella Langley as the Texas song
- Stella Lefty as the Boston song
- They joke that there’s a pattern in new songs tied to places and identities, and that these tracks are becoming surprisingly huge.
TV, Movies, and Recent Watches
- Chris says he finished Five Star Weekend and recommends checking it out.
- They also discuss:
- a horror movie called The Obsession / Obsession
- the modern trend of extreme audio jump scares
- a show called The Shards, which they compare to a teen drama like Riverdale or Euphoria
- Their consensus: it may not be prestige TV, but it’s watchable if you accept the format.
Notable Takeaways
- Leopard print can be treated like a neutral, at least in theory.
- Perez Hilton was a major force in a different, harsher media era where celebrity gossip was more openly mean.
- Drake is extremely funny as a performer, even in absurd reality-TV moments.
- Bird feeders have become high-tech enough to be almost too much—especially when they start pushing notifications and AI species ID.
- Festival culture is now a dominant lens for evaluating acts like The Strokes and pop-country crossover hits.
- Chris and Jason remain highly attuned to status signals, old internet eras, and weirdly specific style references.
Sponsors / Ad Reads Mentioned
- Squarespace
- Quince
Closing
- The episode ends with the usual sign-off and a quick reminder that the show will be back next week.
- They also tease upcoming live/music plans, including Just Like Heaven and the possibility of seeing Feist.