Summary of Afraid to Look: The Moth Radio Hour

Overview of Afraid to Look: The Moth Radio Hour

This episode of The Moth Radio Hour (hosted by Katherine Burns) centers on the theme "Afraid to Look" — stories about avoidance, silence, and the moment people choose to confront what scares them. Across live and Story Slam recordings (some during the pandemic), five storytellers share true, personal narratives about anxiety, repression, cultural identity, parenting fears, and family trauma — and the ways speaking up or facing fears changed their lives.

Episodes and story summaries

• Amanda Stern — live at St. Anne’s Church, Brooklyn Heights

  • Lifelong, paralyzing dread that morphed from childhood separation anxiety into adult panic disorder and depression. At 25, immobilized in her apartment and suicidal, Amanda decides to face her fear rather than end her life. A therapist diagnoses panic disorder; treatment (medication and therapy) gradually restores her ability to live the life she wanted. Core message: avoidance gives fear power; facing it can reclaim agency.

• Tim Manley — New York City Story Slam (WNYC)

  • Physical symptoms (painful bumps and swelling) emerge when Tim can't speak important feelings — especially toward his best friend Ben, whom he loves non-romantically but also romantically. He starts writing nightly messages on his hand and photographing them (a private blog) to externalize emotions. As he releases inner words, his skin heals and he gains the courage to tell Ben; Ben isn’t romantically interested, but the act of expression transforms Tim’s body and life. Core message: unexpressed emotion can manifest physically; speaking can heal.

• Anoush Frunjan — New York City Grand Slam (WNYC)

  • An Armenian-American bride navigates how intensely “Armenian” she is and what that means for marrying a non-Armenian man, Justin. Through priest meetings, baptism preparations, and cultural expectations (crowns, church rituals, dancing), Justin embraces the traditions to marry her. Core message: cultural rituals matter; a partner’s willingness to enter them can affirm identity and belonging.

• Cheryl Murfin — Los Angeles Story Slam (KCRW)

  • A new mother (23 years prior) disobeys midwife advice to stay home, goes grocery shopping with baby, then accidentally leaves the infant in the car. An elderly police officer rescues the child, accompanies Cheryl home, and comforts her without judgment or punishment. Cheryl uses the episode as a touchstone to reassure anxious new parents: mistakes happen, babies and parents are resilient. Core message: empathy from others can avert shame and help parents recover.

• Devin Sandiford — main stage debut, Greenwood Cemetery (Brooklyn)

  • A 35-year-old father and peacemaker finally calls his mother during the pandemic to learn about a family secret: his uncle was shot and killed by police when Devin was a child. Devin recounts his own humiliating stop-and-search experience at 21, the weight of family silence, and how learning the full story (and saying his uncle’s name aloud) begins to break generational trauma. Core message: naming trauma and sharing family history can reconnect, heal, and stop patterns from passing to the next generation.

Main themes and takeaways

• Facing fear beats avoidance: Each storyteller finds that confronting pain — whether panic, suppressed emotion, cultural vulnerability, parental shame, or family trauma — is the pathway to healing.
• Speaking gives power: Externalizing feelings (saying names, telling stories, writing messages) reduces physical and emotional burden and reclaims agency.
• Trauma and silence are intergenerational: Family secrets and unspoken pain can persist and manifest across generations; breaking silence can be a preventive act for children.
• Cultural rituals and identity matter: Traditions shape belonging; a partner’s respect and participation can be deeply validating.
• Small acts of empathy have outsized impact: The police officer who comforted Cheryl, or a partner who agrees to baptism, underline how compassion can change trajectories.

Notable quotes / memorable lines

• Amanda Stern: “Facing my fears is easier than avoiding them. Avoiding them gave my fears power but facing them gives me power.”
• Tim Manley: “I was taking those things that were trapped inside of me and I was communicating them to the outside.”
• Anoush Frunjan (fiancé’s response): “I just want to marry you. If I have to renounce Satan for that, fine. I’ll walk over hot coals.”
• Devin Sandiford: “What I’m really looking for was a connection to my mom and to break the silence that I’ve been holding on to.”

Content warnings

• Discussion of suicidal ideation and attempts (Amanda Stern)
• Police violence, racial profiling, and fatal police shooting (Devin Sandiford)
• Emotional distress, anxiety, and clinical mental health issues across stories

Production & logistics

• Host: Katherine Burns
• Producer: Atlantic Public Media (Woods Hole, MA); episode produced by Jay Allison and Catherine Burns.
• Recordings: Mixed live venues and Story Slams; several segments recorded during the COVID-19 pandemic with reduced audiences and remote viewers.
• Sponsors/underwriters heard in the episode: groom’s, Monarch, Nutrafol, Bombas, Mint Mobile, Shopify, Wayfair, AstraZeneca (note: AstraZeneca segment highlights HATTR awareness).

Resources and suggestions

• If you or someone is in immediate crisis or thinking about suicide (content referenced in this episode): in the U.S. call or text 988 for the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. If outside the U.S., contact local emergency services or local crisis hotlines.
• The Moth: themoth.org — for episodes, submitting stories, and photos referenced in the show.
• HATTR awareness (sponsor partnership): myattrroadmap.com
• Recommended actions inspired by the episode:
  • If you carry long-term fear or silence, consider therapy/medical evaluation (e.g., panic disorder can be treated).
  • Try small acts of externalizing: write a private note, say a name aloud, or share with a trusted person.
  • If family history contains silence around trauma, consider asking compassionate, time-sensitive questions to learn and name what happened.
  • For new parents feeling shame, seek community resources and remember many mistakes are survivable and common.

Final note

This hour emphasizes courage in small, human acts: naming, telling, and showing up. The storytellers’ choices to “look” — and speak — turned quiet suffering into connection, healing, and reclaimed identity.