I Got Out of An Abusive Relationship

Summary of I Got Out of An Abusive Relationship

by Alex Cooper

1h 3m•March 8, 2026
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Overview of I Got Out of An Abusive Relationship

Alex Cooper (Call Her Daddy) visits Harvest Home for an International Women’s Day episode to spotlight how community-based, maternity-focused services help pregnant women experiencing homelessness, domestic violence, and substance use get safe, stable starts. Guests are Sarah (Executive Director of Harvest Home) and Angie (Harvest Home alum). The conversation covers how abuse leads to housing instability, barriers that keep people in unsafe relationships, Harvest Home’s model (shelter + therapy + community), and Angie’s personal journey from abuse and addiction to recovery, motherhood, and independence.

Key points & main takeaways

  • Domestic violence is a leading cause of homelessness for women; Harvest Home reports ~80% of unhoused mothers have experienced domestic abuse.
  • Leaving an abusive relationship is rarely simple: isolation, financial control, fear, shame, and diminished self-worth all create powerful barriers.
  • Pregnancy can increase the risk of domestic violence.
  • Holistic programs that combine safe housing, therapy, prenatal supports (doulas, classes), community, and case management produce strong outcomes.
  • Community rituals (e.g., nightly communal dinners, peer support groups) normalize parenting, rebuild confidence, and reduce isolation.
  • Consistent, nonjudgmental support from friends/volunteers makes a real difference—“keep showing up” is crucial.
  • Personal example: Angie used prescribed opioids to cope, became dependent, lived unstably, found Harvest Home while pregnant, gave birth safely, completed peer-support training, regained full custody of her children, and now lives independently.

Guests

  • Alex Cooper — Host (Call Her Daddy)
  • Sarah — Executive Director, Harvest Home (LA-based nonprofit)
  • Angie — Alumni of Harvest Home; survivor of childhood sexual abuse, intimate partner violence, substance dependence, and homelessness; now sober, employed in recovery-related work, mother of two

What Harvest Home does (program details)

  • Two confidential homes in Los Angeles that serve unhoused pregnant women and their children.
  • Immediate stabilization: safe beds, healthy meals, basic maternity supplies.
  • Clinical supports: on-site therapy, group therapy (they use a curriculum called Seeking Safety), doulas, psychiatric care.
  • Practical supports: parenting classes, life skills, case management, help with transition to independent living.
  • Community structure: nightly dinners (Mon–Fri), group classes, peer support—these create normalization and long-term habits.
  • Intake: phone screening → in-person interview → placement in Venice home → stabilization and services.
  • Confidential addresses and safety protocols for residents.

Barriers to leaving abusive relationships (discussed)

  • Isolation and social control (abusers cut off support networks).
  • Financial abuse (restricted access to money, vehicle, housing).
  • Eroded self-worth and internalized verbal abuse—survivors may believe they deserve mistreatment.
  • Fear of the unknown: homelessness, losing children, or worse situations.
  • Addiction and coping behaviors can complicate escape and recovery.
  • Statistically common to return to abusers multiple times before leaving for good.

Angie’s story — stages and impact

  • Early sexual abuse contributed to lifelong impacts on self-worth and partner choices.
  • Entered abusive relationship in adulthood; isolation and control escalated.
  • Began using prescription opioids to cope; developed dependence and experienced overdoses.
  • Experienced homelessness and slept in a car while pregnant.
  • Found Harvest Home mid-pregnancy, received intensive support, and gave birth a month early with no neonatal withdrawal.
  • Stabilized, completed recovery work, earned a certificate (peer support specialist), entered independent housing, and regained custody of both sons.
  • Core message: sustained support, therapy, spiritual practice and community helped rebuild identity and parenting capacity.

Practical advice & recommendations from the episode

For friends/family supporting someone in an abusive relationship:

  • Keep showing up. Be consistently present and nonjudgmental.
  • Make the relationship a safe place to talk—avoid shaming or repeatedly attacking the partner.
  • Offer practical help (information, rides, resources) and emotional support.
  • Understand leaving is complex and may take multiple attempts.

For people experiencing abuse or instability:

  • Trust your instincts; listen to your gut.
  • Reach out to local services, shelters, or hotlines (see Resources below).
  • If pregnant or caring for small children, ask specifically about maternity-focused programs.

For listeners who want to help:

  • Volunteer locally (meals, mentorship, childcare, classes).
  • Donate to organizations like Harvest Home or similar local shelters and programs.
  • Advocate for trauma-informed, maternity-specific support in your community.

Notable quotes

  • “They believed in you before you believed in yourself.” — (Sarah on Harvest Home’s approach)
  • “Keep showing up.” — Advice for friends of someone in an abusive relationship
  • “When somebody shows you who they are, believe them the first time.” — Angie (advice to her past self)
  • Angie: “My biggest asset is my story”—reframing lived experience as a tool to help others.

Content warning

This episode discusses domestic violence, sexual assault, substance use, and homelessness. Emotional topics may be triggering.

Resources mentioned / Action items

  • Show notes include contact info for:
    • National Domestic Violence Hotline
    • RAINN (Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network)
    • Crisis Text Line
    • National Women’s Shelter Network
  • If you’re in Los Angeles and want to support Harvest Home: volunteer, donate, or check their website (link in episode show notes).
  • If you or someone is in immediate danger, contact local emergency services or the National Domestic Violence Hotline (US) at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or via their website/chat.

Why this episode matters

  • Humanizes the connection between domestic violence, homelessness, and substance use.
  • Demonstrates how targeted, compassionate programs can break cycles of intergenerational trauma.
  • Provides concrete guidance for listeners who want to support survivors or get help themselves.
  • Celebrates the power of women’s community and long-term recovery.

If you want to act: check the episode show notes for Harvest Home’s donation/volunteer links, save the domestic violence hotlines for quick access, and reach out to any friend you’re worried about—consistent, nonjudgmental presence matters.